Courtney-A HaroldxRhonda one-shot

“Hey, fatty!”
Rhonda Wellington Lloyd Berman shot a look of disaproval to her husband as she entered the room, her eight-month pregnant stomach very evident through her nightgown that she had not bothered to change out of when she awoke this morning. It was a gray, rainy day outside, just the kind of day you would rather be lazy and curl up with a good book.
“Call me that again and I may just consider walking out of this house for good.” She said haughtily.
Harold sat on the living room couch, dressed in a simple sweater and some jeans, watching the news and the weather to get a sense of what the weather is like before going off to work. After Mr. Green retired, Harold took over the butcher shop, which had been his dream since he was younger, and still kept the original name in honour of Mr. Green for giving him a chance to work there, and allowing him to take ownership of it.
“No you won’t!” Harold grinned. “Because you’ll always come crawling back.”
Rhonda shook her head before sitting down beside him on the couch. “I can’t exactly crawl in this condition, in case you forgot.”
“Nope.” Harold put an arm around his wife and gently stroked her stomach with his pudgy hand. “Cause I can’t stop thinking just how beautiful you look.”
“Please, I look and feel like a whale. My feet are swollen, my breasts are tender, I can’t stop going to the bathroom and I feel kick after kick after kick.” Rhonda sighed.
Harold just chuckled and nuzzled her cheek. “C’mon Rhonda, I know you talk to the baby when you think I’m not around...you know you’re anxious to see it.”
Rhonda giggled, conceding. “Harold, how do you do that?”
“Do what?” He asked.
“Everything. Ever since we dated, you’ve had this strange power over me that even I can’t understand.”
“It’s called love, Rhonda.” Harold said matter-of-factly, poking her playfully in the nose. “Can’t I show my love?”
“Yes.” Rhonda smiled and snuggled into him, placing his hand back over her stomach. “But pretty soon you’ll have to share it with the baby.”
A gentle kick thumped against Harold’s hand and he smiled, glancing down at her stomach before giving it a loving rub, then looked back down at her. “There’s always room in someone’s heart for love.”
“Wise words. You couldn’t have come up with it.”
“Hey!” Harold cried in mock offense.
Rhonda laughed heartily. “You big oaf.”
“You’re lucky you’re beautiful.” Harold quipped.
“Well of COURSE I’m beautiful. I’m Rhonda Wellington Lloyd Berman, after all. Though now I am not at my most beautiful, at least I can get it back eventually.” She paused a moment as a thought occurred to her. “Oh, Harold, I just remembered. Have you thought of any names?”
“Names, huh? Well, yeah, I actually got a name for a boy. Harold Junior.”
Rhonda scoffed through her nose and gave a laugh, smacking him playfully on the stomach. “Very funny. But there will be no Juniors in this house. ...Unless it’s Rhonda Junior, of course.”
“No fair! I can’t have a junior, but you can?”
“Whatever Rhonda wants, she gets.” She smirked.
He rolled his eyes good-naturedly and smiled. “Well actually, I’ll do you one better. I got a better name for a girl. Courtney.”
Rhonda looked at him wide-eyed, unable to believe that he remembered. All those years ago, fourth grade, nine years old, taking care of an egg like it was a baby. Yet ruined by the fact he had been hungry and left with no choice but to eat the egg that Rhonda had dubbed as Courtney, therefore messing up their project, and yet, it was one of those times they truly connected.
Yep, Harold remembred.
“You remembred our egg story...” Rhonda marveled, and smiled. “Our little Courtney.”
“Sure I remember! I was so hungry that I ate it!” Harold recalled, laughing. “But man I know I won’t eat the real Courtney!”
“You big oaf, I would have to castrate you with a dull hacksaw and then murder you.” Rhonda threatened playfully, poking his chest.
“Yes Ma’am.” He said weakly, and smiled again.
Rhonda giggled and kissed him on the cheek. “Well, then Courtney it is. At least this time I’ll have an excuse to dress her up in cute little clothes without you whining about it.”
“Hey, it was an egg!” Harold snickered. “Okay, okay, it was Courtney in spirit, but still an egg!”
“Humour me, won’t you?” Rhonda pouted.
Harold ran his fingers through her hair and sighed contendedly. “Cut it out, Rhonda. You know what pouting does to me.”
“Why do you think I use it?” Rhonda smirked, and lay her head against his shoulder, sighing too. “You know, it’s funny. Back in the fourth grade, we were given an egg, Courtney, to take care of like it was our real baby. And now in another month, we’ll have the real thing to take care of...the real Courtney, if it’s a girl.”
Harold gave a nod of agreement, still playing with her hair. “Remember Arnold and Helga’s egg? It hatched into a chick!”
Rhonda giggled. “Who could forget? If that wasn’t foreshadowing for those two, I don’t know what is. Heck, that whole egg story was foreshadowing for a lot of us, wasn’t it?”
“It was for us!” Harold hugged her tighter to him. “Because now you’re here, Mrs. Berman.”
“Oh shut up you big oaf.” Rhonda giggled, embracing him in return. “If anyone had told me back then, that you and I would be married and having a baby, let’s just say I would have thought they were mistaken and delusional. Isn’t that ironic?”
“Haha! Weren’t also the same girl trying to drag me into the Tunnel of Love at the Cheese Festival, saying ‘You know you like me’?” Harold laughed.
“Harold! Come on, I was nine, and I was...so what if I did?” Rhonda mock-pouted.
“Admit it Rhonda, you couldn’t resist me even back then.” Harold winked at her.
“Please! That’s a lie.” She crossed her arms.
“Not now it isn’t.
Rhonda snorted and giggled. “Harold Berman, if you don’t cut it out, I’ll throw out all the Mr. Fudgy bars.”
“You could never do that. I love my Mr. Fudgy bars, and you love me.” Harold held her closer and nuzzled her temple. “C’mon Rhonda, you can’t do it.”
“You’re the worst.”
“Am not! I’m the best.” Harold looked at the time. “And I have to get to work or I’ll be late. Gotta bring in the money somehow!” He winked and kissed her sweetly before releasing her. “I’ll be in by five.”
“I’ll have dinner ready then.” Rhonda winked at him and stood up.
“Meatloaf, right?”
“How’d you guess?”
“It’s Meatloaf Wednesday.” Harold winked and rubbed her stomach. “See ya Courtney, or Harold Junior!”
“Harold!”
Harold laughed and grabbed his book bag. “I’ll see you later, hon.” He kissed her on the cheek before heading out the door.
Rhonda smiled and watched after him for a couple of moments, even after she heard his car exiting the driveway and driving off. She sat back down on the sofa, propping her feet onto the ottoman and letting out a dreamy, contended sigh.
“Courtney...yeah, we’ll name her Courtney.” She murmured.